This blog post is for teachers, students and everyone meeting anyone for the first time.
The aim is not to give definitive answers, but to raise awareness of this issue and to open a discussion.
I once had a toe-curling experience where people with ethnic names were not shown respect:
All new students in a Danish college were gathered for the start of intro activities, and a division into groups was underway. A student called out the names of each group's participants and they had to respond that they were present.
The first time he came across a name that wasn't typically Danish, he messed with it and mispronounced it. It caused a bit of a laugh, and one girl said "Maybe it's me you mean" which led to more laughter. About a third of all the new students had names that were not typically Danish.
Every time the announcer came up with a name of ethnic origin other than Danish, he mumbled something, which caused laughter every time, and in the end he himself almost gave up being serious and was laughing along.
Although it was he, who was laughed at, the worst part was that it was apparent that everyone who did not have a Danish name just didn't fit in, was strange in some way and maybe even had a ridiculous name.
There were many of us who curled our toes and didn't laugh along. But none of us did anything. What could we have done? What do you do the next time something similar happens?
I have chosen to pass on this series of slides created by a young man in London because he has given you many constructive thoughts on this very question.
He has also made a 12-minute video introduction which is available on YouTube. Click here
Not everyone likes the name given to them by their parents.
The worst example I know is two brothers who were named by their Kenyan father after their father's great role models. The father was a passionate Stalinist, so nothing could be better than naming the baby boys after Lenin and Stalin. One was named Vladimir Illich, and the other Joseph. They naturally got the family's African name as their surname; it cannot be otherwise in Kenya.
The father ended up as a disillusioned and angry man who lived alone in a cabin. The sons developed in completely different directions than the father had imagined. Vladimir Illich is now a successful businessman, but he had changed his name long before that. Joseph is now a bishop, and his name with biblical roots fits the job well.
Summa summarum: Isn't it okay - after asking “What's your name?” and repeating the name, then asking “Is that what you'd like to be called?”
I have a neighbor with a Chinese background. When I get an SMS from her, the sender is "Victoria / Xia". I've tried to learn to pronounce Xia correctly, but I didn't succeed, she says. She has given up on teaching Danes to pronounce it correctly, so she says, "Call me Victoria".
Is it wrong to accept Victoria / Xia's own proposal?
It is a good idea to add the names of those, you write to, in your word processor's memory. It's an easy way to make sure you respect the name when writing to someone.
It is a fact that "Naming practices by European colonizers served to inject a sense of shame and legacy of inferiority", but it is not true that Africans were "left nameless". Parents who are Christians traditionally give their children names from the Bible as their baptismal names, but the surname that they are given is the surname of the family, often marking extensive kinship relations. So, the children become attached both to the parents' faith and the family to which they will always belong.
Deepening about languages: “A language dies every 14 days” Click
I return to the toe-curling experience where people with ethnic names were not shown respect (as told in the beginning of this blogpost):
If there is a next time, I will say: "I have a small suggestion: When your name is called, please, repeat your name and say e.g., "Peter Jensen here" or "Abdulrazak Gurnah here", then we may respect everyone’s name, because you live in your name!"
What would you say?
More resources:
- How to Respect my Ethnic Name (12 minutes, YouTube video), click
- All 11 slides of “How to Respect my ethnic name” by Anpu as pdf in printer friendly version, full color, text only and braille. Klick https://www.anpu.london/name
Teach GLOBAL CITIZENSHIP Newsletter no. 47
Overall, the topic is a good one to work with, and think about. One area which could use more discussion is what to do when you actually cannot produce the sounds of the "foreign" name? The slides you provide tell us what not to do, however, in some instances there will not be a satisfactory pronunciation because learning how to say the necessary sounds could take years of practice. For example, in English the combination of the letters "th" creates a sound which Danes have trouble pronouncing since it is not in their language. Words like "think", "though", "thought", etc. are stumbled and mumbled until they have been heard and practiced many times.
SvarSletWith that in mind, the "foreigners" Danes encounter most likely will not be able to reproduce Danish names with special letters only found in the Danish alphabet like æ, ø, å, etc., until they have had lots of practice too. Which brings me to my next thought.
If you are sincere in trying to pronounce a name, and you have done all you can to be polite, it is now up to the person you are dealing will to reassure you for your efforts. We all know someone from a different land, ethnicity, language. Getting to know someone requires a give and take interaction. Giving respect means getting respect. That is our primary goal in our globalized world. Thank you for sharing.